The wind was against me as I jogged through the trees. The trail was hidden under a layer of leaves coloured crimson, gold and burnt orange. I took in deep rhythmic breaths of the crisp air.
Fifteen minutes into my run snow began to catch in the wind and rush towards me. I welcomed the moment — running between the seasons of fall becoming winter.
Transition. Something I’m trying to embrace as an old friend but it doesn’t take much for the overwhelming sensation of the unknown to become that lead ball in the pit of my belly.
I’ve been here before.
Three years ago, I dreaded the thought of returning to Canada without prospects, without dreams. I had been away for three and half years. I was living abroad, living my dream and exploring my limits: trekking across the volcanic peaks that surrounded me, running distances along the narrow roads between rice fields that I never imagined myself capable of, and spending days meditating with zen masters amidst bamboo forests and ancient temples.
Returning was terrifying. I was fine catching trains in China on my own, or taking wild bus rides that twist and turn with the mountainous landscape between Kathmandu and Pokhara, but going back…
I went back, reflected and remembered I still had some very big dreams to pursue. It didn’t take long to overcome that transition — although it felt like years at the time.
I’m yet again on the blank page that separates the chapters in a book.
Winter is calling as November approaches. In 13 days we will set our clocks back an hour and the frost will finally claim the resilient kale in my garden. I will trust the process of change in my own life. The cyclical shift that is familiar but feels new every time.
It’s a transitional time for the entire country. The federal election is tomorrow. After 10 years of a conservative government we may see change, or we may not. I plan to vote early before work and make my mark for the future.
On my run today, I had the energy in my legs to carry me further than I planned on going. I avoided the paved sidewalks and suburban streets as long as possible. I was caught up by the beauty of the weather altering the landscape around me. I navigated unfamiliar trails that forked off my usual route until one ultimately led me to the main path and I returned home.